Article and Photography by Rachel Leah Gerson at Doorway to Self
The moon moved into Sagittarius late last night where it will be tomorrow when the moon is full.
It just so happens that our lovely Saturn in retrograde is also in the sign of Sagittarius, which means that Saturn- which is testing our every whim, at the moment- is in the same sign as the full moon, which brings out the fullest sensitivity of our emotional bodies.
Expect to be triggered- the fire has been lit.
But don’t let that scare or deter you from living… Triggers are the gateway for growth. It is not until we understand our deepest fears and sensitivities- what makes us want to crawl away or fight, what makes us truly angry or disappointed in ourselves, what makes us sad and what makes us blame others for our own creation of circumstance- that we can truly learn ourselves.
Sag gifts us each bows and arrows to look our inner demons in the face shoot them with flaming arrows. We shoot in the dark, but when our flaming arrows hit our shadows- our trigger points, our demons- we light them aflame so that we can witness them- witness ourselves- in all of their messy glory.
This is the opportunity in which we can fully see ourselves. And I mean fully. All of the shame, doubt, depression, the things we deprive ourselves of, self-loathing, absence of love, full-blown hate, hurt, childhood wounds, adulthood wounds, shortcomings, “faults”- all of it. Because how would we appreciate the light without having experienced the darkest parts of ourselves?
Doorway to Self is challenging you, today!
Part A: Look at one thing (emotion, behaviour, etc.) that has been coming up for you, lately, that you truly dislike about yourself or about your life or about the way in which other people are interacting with you, and be completely honest with yourself about it. What do you really feel about this aspect? Have you uncovered your true feelings about it, or have you been attributing it to something else that is more complicated or petty?
Maybe you never felt truly “seen” as a child, and so it triggers you when you receive judgements from others, now, even if you may feel more accepted. Or maybe you were always told that you were “too much”, and now you feel like you need to be passive in most situations, which has been triggering feelings of anger and frustration at not being able to fully show up in the way that you would like to, or at not being accepted as your full, beautiful Self. The point is, dig deep. Sometimes we make things much more complicated by ignoring the root of the concern.
Part B: Sit with that feeling or new understanding. How does it feel in your body? In your soul? In your mind?
Part C: Let stuff come up! Cry! Scream! Yell! Shake your fists! Wrap your arms around yourself in fits of laughter! Give yourself the gift of completely surrendering to yourself. Move with your body. Move with your spirit. Move with your voice. What is it that you need to do to move into the full expression of this emotion; to truly feel it; to fully acknowledge it.
Part D: Make a commitment to yourself to be mindful of this trigger or emotion or reaction (or whatever it is you choose) in your daily life.
Part E: Make a plan of action to be able to transmute and transform through this.
Part F: Feel free to be witnessed in sharing your experiences! With friends or family, with yourself over video or in your journal, over voice memos or talking to yourself in the shower. If you have a really beautiful go at this and want to be witnessed in your story, Doorway to Self will publish the written version on the blog. You can send it in to firstname.lastname@example.org.
My biggest hope for humanity is that we can work as individuals to expand through our deepest perceived downfalls to be able to grow within ourselves- bloom and thrive as individuals, come together as a people, change the world.
We have each been given a bow and flaming arrow. The choice is yours as to whether or not you want to shoot it.
As always, my love to you all on this Vibrant and Potent Full Moon!
xx D2S ❤
Photography and Article by Rachel Leah Gerson at Doorway to Self
A lot of people have described the intensity building over the last month or so. And there has been a lot. I feel that this moon is the pinnacle of it, really. The culmination. And also the catalyst for what is to come. We are only in the baby stages of this Saturn retrograde cycle, which I only touched upon in the last article (here).
Saturn is all about facing your deepest and harshest shadows. It went retrograde about a month ago, and will go direct again in mid-August. For those of us who are not experiencing Saturn Return right now (an article about this soon to come), this has been, and will continue to be, a period of time in which we will be staring ourselves in the mirror pretty hardcore. When we look, the love is still in our eyes shining back brightly at us, but we can also see all of our deepest pains, regrets, and consequences.
The lessons that we may have thought we learned, before, are coming to seek us out again, just to make sure we really “got it”.
So what does this have to do with this Scorpio full moon? Well… Scorpio is the sign that takes things to the deepest depths. The core of mystery brought to experience. The core of shadows come to surface.
Water, water, water.
Water is light on the surface, and as we plunge deeper deeper down, the meditation becomes more colourful until we descend into its muted blues.
Psychically, it’s easier to “see” in the darkness. So we draw from the astral plane. We see ourselves from the outside in. And we delve into the parts we see need working on.
This is intense, folks. But if you hit it head-on, if you really face yourself and dive into your emotions and the way in which you communicate with others and the way it all feels in your body and the way that you… feel, in general, you will be just. fine. Especially if you do it with self-compassion, knowing that it is okay to be “imperfect”- that is what makes you perfect. It is okay to have darkness within you. To have things that you are ashamed of or even just less than proud of. That is what makes you human. Hold yourself through this, darlings. Facing yourself is the key to transcendence. Facing yourself is the key to growth. How can we grow what we cannot see?
This Scorpio moon will help to hold the mirror up for us to swim through during this period of Saturn retrograde. It’s that extra boost of energy to be able to go within and make a plan to sort through what we need to sort through.
Happy swimming. Happy growing. Happy shadows.
All of my love to you and more,
xx D2S ❤
Article and Photography by Rachel Leah Gerson
The Bottom Line
With Mercury, Saturn and Venus in retrograde at the same time, what we are doing is looking at our patterns, facing our lessons, facing our selves, questioning what we really want out of life, discarding things that are not serving us, and having to put forth more effort into communicating with each other. The full moon in Libra falling on the 11th will illuminate all of this and help to bring it to a pinnacle where you can really vacillate with freedom between your choices before collaborating with your higher self, your inner knowing, and any astral friends (or guides or whatever you might have helping you on the other side of the veil) to make any important judgments or decisions you might need to make in order to move forward in the most direct and pleasing way on your path.
Judgment is an important facet of the human experience. We are always taught not to judge, but it is innate in our beings- it is how we understand who we are, where we stand, and who we want to be. It is how we learn discernment as to who or what we want in our lives. Judgment is how we keep ourselves in check.
This month’s full moon falls in Libra, the sign of the scales. Of weighing things out. Of discernment. Of balance.
For many of us, there are a lot of things to weigh out, right now.
So much potency has been in place in our sky, as of late. Venus went retrograde on 4 March, giving us the space to turn our lives inside out to really look at what it is that we truly want. What is it that sparks our passion? How are we feeling in relation to others? How do we jive (or not) with sexuality? Are we letting our creativity flow the way that we need it to? Is your current partner (if you have one) meeting your passions and encouraging you to come from the heart in pursuing those? Are you doing that for yourself?
I find that when Venus goes retrograde, it tends to flip my world upside down, a little bit… or right side up, depending on how you look at it. It’s like lifting up a rock and remembering all of this stuff is under it that you forgot was there, or maybe seed started to grow that you never even realised you planted.
It is a time of change, a time of reintroducing the love into your life in places that have not been fulfilled, and a time of weighing out what it is that you really, truly, want in your life. Venus retrograde is Universe’s way of putting you back into flow with yourself, with serendipity, and with Universe itself, and it is also a way of helping you to rid your life of what is no longer serving you.
Interestingly to our aspects, Venus went retrograde just before the March full moon in Virgo, and will end just after this full moon in Libra as it goes direct on the 15th.
So it began with a grounding sensation in virgin territory– in newness; an awakening- understanding the power within ourselves as energetic beings. It then flew through the spring equinox where many of us were awakened by the changing equilibrium of the sun and excited to explore growth in a way that was transformational, watching the flowers bloom beneath our feet as we moved forward.
It continued its beautiful work through the new moon in Aries, where our drive was really instilled and our feverous notions realised (I will touch more on this below), and then it was nudged to really put into motion things that would help to tie up loose ends when Saturn went retrograde on 6 April (also talked about below). To make matters more intense, Mercury has gone retrograde today, 9 April, and is causing people to spend a little bit more time and effort on communicating. Perhaps, for some people in romantic relationships or friendships that are hanging by a thread, that extra energy needed for clear communication might just be what takes a toll on the relationship and brings it to a closing.
And with that, Venus’s retrograde is now finishing up its last act- wrapping up our comprehension of what we want to keep in our lives, what we don’t, and what we might want more of- as we come to this day of the full moon on the 11th– a portal day (also to be touched on, later), where the consciousness of where we are at as individuals in relation to the rest of the world will be recognised and understood in a way that brings new clarity towards who we are, what brings us joy, and what is holding us back.
I don’t know about you, but I have really been feeling such a surge of energy and such a build surrounding this moon, even when it was new in the sign of Aries. That Aries spark lit my fire, and I have witnessed this taking place over the last few weeks in the lives of others, as well. So our passions have been lit, and our drives put into gear. And I feel that this drive has never been put into park since the gas pedal was pushed- that is the energy propelling this full moon.
All of this exertion that hasn’t even felt taxing in most ways- it has been energising, actually!- is going to continue to push full force until the night of this full moon where it will just completely open and expand! Universe has really been working to open us up and push us forward these last few weeks.
Everything has just been building and building! This is such an interesting parallel to this past fall… I feel that this same energy was taking place around the end of October and into November, but in a much darker and heavier way. This time, I feel that we are truly emerging with the first blossoms, and happy not only to see the light, but to run with it and see where it goes. Who knows- maybe we all just look like cats after laser pointers right now… or, we could also be like moss, following the light to give ourselves, and others, direction.
Like I said, this moon falls in Libra on an 11 day, which also has the energy of a 2 (1+1=2). Balance and duality are really key, here, with this moon. And the energy of Libra’s air will help to connect you to your higher self, as well, to be able to make important decisions.
Saturn went retrograde last week on 6 April– yet another thing positioned in our atmosphere to help us to reflect and understand what is and is not working for us in our lives at this point in time. Saturn retrograde is another flipper-upside-down state of life. If you are going through your return (i.e. if you are around the age of 27-30, 54-60, or 81-90) then you will have a nice little break from all of the internal work you have been doing surrounding yourself and facing your lessons.
But if you are any age other than those mentioned, you will probably be put into situations that will test you to see if you have really learned past lessons or not. This will likely be the case until 25 August when it goes direct, again. This means that you will be forced to make decisions and to use your discernment, once again, to form judgments on where you are, what you are doing, and how you want to go about whatever situations you may find yourself in. Are you repeating unhealthy patterns? Are you finding yourself in the midst of another toxic relationship? Are you having to renegotiate boundaries with the people around you?
Hopefully the full moon will help, a little bit, with giving you balance through the beginning of this process. It will leave you with the lesson and the energy of weighing out your options so that you will know how to do that a little bit more easily through the course of this Saturn retrograde action.
If you’re not familiar with Mercury retrograde, there is an article written that you can find, here, to learn more about it. Mercury goes retrograde, today, 9 April, making it extra important to pay attention to how we communicate, and, really, to just be mindful, in general- it is easy to have misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and technological malfunctions.
But if you really pay attention and put forth the effort to be extra communicative with the people in your life, it can actually be a very gratifying and beautiful span of time. Just remembering to be grateful (which is an essential practise whether Mercury is retrograde, or not) can really raise the ceiling and make it so that technological and communication break downs do not happen as often, or even, maybe, at all!
Portal Day, 11
Lastly, this full moon falls on a “portal” day of 11. 11’s are gateways to the astral world, to higher self, and to inner knowing. They open up the psychic world to make it more accessible to interact with, should you choose to (or even should you not, sometimes!). The full moon is generally a time of this, as well, as it sheds light on the veil between worlds and opens up our third eyes. To have the two in combination makes for some very extreme psychic energy, and the retrograde cycles add to that portal opening, as well, as it adds to us looking at things in many different lights and shades of colour.
This moon is really a potent one, and an important one. I am sending so much love to you to be able to push through this and get everything that you need out of it. Just remember that in any circumstance, you always have the choice to emerge a better person.
Love, as always,
Doorway to Self
xx D2S ❤
Article written by Rachel Leah Gerson, Photography from Pablo by Buffer
As we are celebrating the first New Moon of the astrological calendar year today (27 March) in Aries, Doorway to Self has decided to give you a gift to help yourself sync up to the sun and the moon a little bit more organically. How is it that astrologers and astrology geeks (such as myself) know exactly what sign the moon is in when it is new or full? It’s a simple trick, really, if you can memorise the order of the 12 astrological signs- or at least know what sign the sun is in!
When we say that the moon (or any planet or the sun) is in a “sign”, it is because it is literally occupying the same space in the night sky as that sign. So, for instance, if you were born in the sun sign of Sagittarius, it means that the sun was literally in the sign of Sagittarius in the sky when you were born.
That said, let’s look at how new and full moons work, astronomically. When the moon is “New”, it is because it is travelling directly behind the sun in the sky, and cannot reflect the sun at all, therefore causing it to appear dark. Conversely, when the moon is “Full”, it is because it is directly opposite the sun in the sky, allowing the light from the sun to reflect across and bounce off of the moon’s surface to give the full shape gorgeous glow.
So, now, think about it.
If the moon is new it means that it is right next to the sun in the sky. And if it is right next to the sun then it means that it is in the same sign in the sky. So if the sun is in Sagittarius and we are in a New Moon phase, then the moon will be new in Sagittarius. If the sun is in Aries and we are in a New Moon phase, then the moon will also be in the sign of Aries. Easy, right?
Okay, so maybe some of you see where this is going, next. When the moon is full, it means it is directly across from the sun in the sky. And, if it is directly across from the sun and there is an equal number of astrologically significant signs (12), then that means that the moon will be in the sign exactly opposite that of the sun. So if the sun is in Sagittarius, the moon with be in Gemini. If the sun is in Gemini, the moon will be in Sagittarius. If the sun is in Aries, the moon will be in Libra, and vice versa. So the full moon and the new moon are in exactly the same signs at exactly the same time of the astrological year, every single year!
Quiz: It’s 27 March and there is a new moon. What sign is the new moon in? First look at where the sun is. If it’s 27 March it means that we are about a week into the sun’s transit of Aries. And if the sun is in Aries and the moon is new, that means the moon is in…? If you’re thinking Aries, you are correct! So let’s make it more difficult.
Another Quiz: It’s 27 March of a different year and there is a full moon. What sign is the full moon in? First look at where the sun is. If it’s 27 March it means that we are about a week into the sun’s transit of Aries. And if the sun is in Aries and the moon is full, that means the moon is in…? (The answer’s above if you don’t have the opposites memorised.) …Okay, so, if you thought the moon would be full in Libra, you are correct!
Annnndddddd we couldn’t let you celebrate the New Moon with this information and not give you a handy little chart to hang by your bed or in your meditation space or altar space or notebook or whatever it is you believe in or have or use. You can find that below!
Good luck and much love (as always),
xx D2S ❤
Here’s a little quick reference guide:
New and Full Moon Astrological Sign Chart
Sun New Moon Full Moon
Aries (21 March- 19 April) Aries Libra
Taurus (20 April- 20 May) Taurus Scorpio
Gemini (21 May- 20 June) Gemini Sagittarius
Cancer (21 June- 22 July) Cancer Capricorn
Leo (23 July- 22 August) Leo Aquarius
Virgo (23 August- September 22) Virgo Pisces
Libra (23 September- 22 October) Libra Aries
Scorpio (23 October- 21 November) Scorpio Taurus
Sagittarius (22 November- 21 December) Sagittarius Gemini
Capricorn (22 December- 19 January) Capricorn Cancer
Aquarius (20 January- 18 February) Aquarius Leo
Pisces (19 February- 20 March) Pisces Virgo
Sometimes it just takes a little bit of sun and water to bring out the most brilliant blossoms from the prickliest of places. Spring is almost here (in the northern hemisphere, anyways), and the sun is out and the rains have come and will come. I am very much itching to crack my shell and poke through the goo and sharp edges to emerge into growth and sunshine. The Spring Equinox is a time of new growth and celebration; of emerging from darkness into light; of warmer effing weather (seriously, though).
Most of us have seriously felt that darkness this year, deep in our cores, starting in September or October or so, just at the pique of eclipse season and the Autumnal Equinox.
So now we emerge at the end of nature’s palindrome- It went Light, Equinox, Eclipses, Darkness, and now we’re going Darkness, Eclipses, Equinox, Light. Pretty cool, eh? Gotta love the patterns of Universe.
We have gone through the depths, this year, into our darkest, most inconspicuous shadows, shattered the glass on the reflections of the versions of ourselves that we no longer wished to embody, ended relationships, friendships, and dramas that were no longer serving us, lost loved ones, created new boundaries for ourselves and others, and learned how to face adversity by conquering our greatest fears.
And it was painful. And a little (or a lot) sticky at times. And then we collapsed into ourselves for a bit trying to process it all.
But the sun has come back into our lives in not only a more forgiving way, but in a more encouraging way. So now it’s time to take our latest versions of ourselves and bring that to the surface, both in vulnerability and in strength. We can move forward knowing that we are responsible for ourselves, and that only we- as individuals- have the “say so” in who we are, what we do, and how we process life.
Not only are cactus flowers blooming, but holidays involving eggs are celebrated all over the world at this time of year- Noruz (the Persian new year), Passover (Jewish remembrance of leaving slavery for freedom), Easter (resurrection of Jesus), Ostara (Western European Pagan celebration of the Equinox), and more. There are many reasons for this, but one very pertinent to this particular article is the idea of rebirth. Eggs are round, signifying a cycle. Time is not linear, and we are never born only once in any given lifetime.
We rebirth ourselves every year. Every month. Every day.
Any time we choose to, we can take a deep breath, let it out slowly, and start over again on the next inhale. As such, we can also choose to crawl away into a new shell, again, for however long we need to take our time and space, and we can crack it open to breathe in fresh light and new air whenever we deem it appropriate or necessary.
So what do you say- are you ready to crack open your shell and burst into the light of the new spring sun? Are you ready to watch the fruits of your heavy labour- emotionally, spiritually, mentally, physically- from this last year bloom through the flowers emerging from desert cacti?
I, for one, am excited to burst forth with you.
Wishing you a happy Equinox, an easy crack at this exciting new cycle, and a gorgeous season full of bloom to come.
xx D2S ❤
Written by Rachel Leah Gerson for Doorway to Self
Photography by Rachel Leah Gerson taken in Indian Wells, California, at Mt.Eisenhower.
I don’t know about all of you, but I’ve really been feeling this one build. Starting at about the half moon, I was already feeling the pull of the magic to come when full. I knew I needed to write this article today, though- the Virgo energy is already strong, and the moon doesn’t enter the sign for another few hours. I’ve been feeling a pull straight from my chest every time I see the moon, like she’s calling my heart to her.
Okay, so maybe that sounds fake and cheesy and half of you checked out at that sentence, but that’s just the way I’ve been feeling the last few days. I’ve caught myself looking into puddles of water at her reflection, or holding up wet palms to see her sheen on my skin, making me glow and see myself as divinity.
There are two very distinct but intertwined energies at hand with this Virgo moon. The first is everything that I’ve been describing- an empowering of the Self, a delving into our inner power as individuals, and an understanding of the divine in the individuals surrounding us. We- men, women, and everyone in between- are powerful. We have abilities within us that are unfathomable, and we are beginning to realise our potentials as individuals and as a whole.
This is a time to go within, find your power, and burst outwards! It is a time for practise runs of unleashing of our truest, boldest, most inspired Selves, or even a time to quit the “practising” part and just shine the way you have been wanting to. If you are looking for permission to give the gift- to yourself and to others- of your authenticity, this year’s Virgo full moon is it!
It is also a time to recognise the power in others when they let their authentic selves shine, even if there’s only a glimpse of it glimmering in the moonlight. Our brightest selves shine when we let others shine, too, especially when all involved are being truly authentic to themselves and to the world around them.
The second part of the Virgo energy is the drive it instils within us. Virgo is very much about planning things out, discovering the best tactics for great return, and getting things done. So why is it that I say that these two energies- this one and the one of grasping your inner power and letting your authenticity lead the way- work so well together?
Well, most of the time, we work on ourselves and find our authenticity and our inner power and yada yada yada and we get excited about it and then we’re like, “What the hell am I supposed to do with this?” And then we get scared and the fear impairs our empowerment and we discontinue to be authentic because it’s scary and what if other people don’t accept me and what if they judge me and what if I fail and and and and!!
So… what happens is that you have the energy from the moon to help you grasp the gold inside of yourself and mine it, and then the inevitable “What the hell do I do with this” question appears, and that other energy bursts into you and the drive fills you and you’re like, “Okay. Here’s my plan.” And even if you don’t have an actual concrete plan, you’ll feel as though you do because the energy will leave you feeling solid like you do. So what happens then is that you feel confident in your confidence; you don’t fear it and you don’t get anxious. You just. Feel. Strong. And then you spread that energy outwards to others, and they know it’s okay to be themselves around you, too.
This moon will leave you feeling strong, yet peaceful in your strength.
The Virgo air will be at your back giving you the strength and sparking your passion enough to let yourself soar.
Take this time to notice yourself- how beautiful you are, inside and out. How courageous you are. How sensitive you are. How much serious power you have inside of you that you can use to alchemise your life. The winds of change are upon you, and you have full control over yourself and your life.
To turn a negative into a positive. To focus on bettering yourself rather than others. To conquer your fears instead of involving yourself in unnecessary dramas that you are using to distract you from facing those fears. To help others see the power within them. And to treat yourself- and love yourself- the way that you would like others to treat you. And to then treat them the same way.
Everyone has the potential to be silhouetted in silver- all they have to do is step into the moonlight.
Sending you so much love as always,
xx D2S ❤